I’m not talking about the summer sunshine or the beautiful changing leaves of autumn. I’m talking about where I am right now. In life.
There is a season for everything under the sun (Ecclesiastes 3:1).
About a year ago, halfway through the pregnancy of my second kiddo, I moved to a new state, switched from major career mode to stay-at-home-mommy, joined a new church, enrolled my daughter into a new preschool, hubby started a new job and we all just basically jumped right into a new [everything]! At least that’s how it seemed.
It was actually a major adjustment for me. I was so used to waking up at the crack of dawn every
morning, getting myself and my family fed and out the door as fast as I could, working hard all day and then coming home exhausted but unbelievably eager to soak up the last few hours of the day with my little family. I had my friends and co-workers that I was used to seeing every day, my favorite coffee shops I stopped at every morning, my quick commute to work every day, and our favorite Saturday morning breakfast spot every weekend.
I should mention that while I was sad to leave all these familiar things, I was so very excited about this new season at the time. I would be switching into the role of SAHM, and I could not have been more excited! I couldn’t wait to enjoy the bliss of what I just knew my new life would be like. Waking up at a leisurely pace every morning, slowly sipping my morning joe out of my favorite coffee mug as my daughter slept peacefully until 9 a.m. or so while I read my Bible. She would wake up, and I’d enthusiastically enjoy making her favorite breakfast that we could eat together as we sat in pure joy at the kitchen table until finishing up and playing together all day long.
You get my drift.
Well. Anyone who ever been a SAHM knows that this is not how life actually ends up being.
To my surprise it was more like: wake up super early to my three-year-old climbing on me because she is in full go-mode and ready to slay this day all by her big bad self and I better hurry up and get myself together if I want any part in being her parent for the day; better have the coffee pot ready the night before because I just may have enough time to race over and push “start” and then choose between guzzling that cup of coffee or reheating it ten times before 2 p.m. when (hopefully) naptime rolls around and I can (hopefully) finish the last few sips. Makeup? Psh. Hair? Chopped it off, who has the time? Nice clothes? Nope. Try workout clothes. Every day. And that exhaustion that I had as a working mommy at the end of every day? Yeah that didn’t go away. Still completely spent at the end of the day.
Needless to say, it was definitely an adjustment for me.
Now, a year later, I am finally actually learning to embrace and (I can hardly believe I’m saying this) enjoy the crazy. For me, it’s learning not to sweat the small stuff, and remembering that stressful moments are just that. Stressful moments. I constantly remind myself that “it’s not a stressful life, it’s just a stressful moment.” Otherwise, I become completely overwhelmed and feel as though I cannot stay afloat. Plus who wants to let a tough parenting moment turn into an awful day, anyway?
Now, for those who don’t know me, I’ll tell you that I am a major visionary. Always looking to the future. I have a vision for literally everything in my life. My family, my career, my finances, my marriage, my parenting, everything. Heck I even have a vision for how I want my grocery list to look and how I want my family to spend the evenings we have together at home! I am always thinking ahead and planning how I will reach my goals so that I can move on to the next level of [whatever].
It’s wonderful, actually. Because it causes me to achieve. But in all of these different seasons, I have to remind myself that it’s all about balance. Because even though it is so important to be planning and thinking futuristically, it is also important to just embrace the season you’re in right now – the good, the bad, the ugly. I really don’t want to be looking ahead so much that I neglect to stop and embrace where I am.
I remember those days as a working mommy, and how I would sit in my office trying diligently to focus on being the absolute best employee I could possibly be, but wishing with every fiber of my being that I could be at home, soaking up the early years of my daughter’s life with her. I wished, hoped, prayed for that.
And now I have that.
Let that sink in for a minute.
It took me a whole year to adjust to this new season that I had to wait 3.5 whole years to get to! I prayed for the season that I am currently in. When I would get weary, I would picture in my mind the day that would come when I could be at home with my little one (which turned into two little ones).
So that is what brings me to actually embracing my season. Now I find myself being thankful for this season, knowing that it will not last forever. One day I will look back on it as bucket full of memories, and it’s up to me as to whether I will look back in awe, or in dread. I choose awe. I choose to be totally captivated by this beautiful season that I am in. Yes, planning for the next season, but also totally present in the current one. Totally committed to doing my absolute best. Every day. Embracing this season to the fullest extent.
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